5 Tips for Special One-on-One Moments with Your Kids
Occasionally, I find myself in a rut where it seems I haven't had enough one-on-one time with my little ones. When I get too caught up, I start to notice their behavior changing as a reminder. It's something I'm not proud of, but with three kids, it can happen.
Finding time outside of school, activities, and playdates, on top of my nonstop mom duties that seem to multiply like rabbits, can feel almost impossible. The thing is, spending one-on-one time with your kid or finding ways to bond with them doesn’t have to be a grand event. It can be and those are the best, but when life doesn’t allow it, you have to get creative.
I have incorporated five new ways to bond with my children, independently and together, to help everyone feel more loved and special and to strengthen my bond with them. Even adopting just one of these ideas for you and your family can make a meaningful difference, creating lasting memories and strengthening your relationship with your child(ren).
Nightlight all three of my kids love, essential for smooth nights
1. One Night a Week, Lay Together
This one is at the top of my list because it’s something I’ve been doing for the past year and was the easiest to incorporate into our busy lives. I have three kids: a 7-year-old girl (8 next month), a 6-year-old boy, and a 2-year-old girl (3 in two months).
Nowadays, I still lie down with my youngest until she drifts off to sleep. The idea of moving from her bed to another seemed exhausting, and I could easily picture myself falling asleep in their beds, only to zombie-walk back to my own bed before starting my nighttime routine.
So, the first thing I did was assign nights. My oldest is every Wednesday, and my son is every Saturday night. I recommend weekend nights if you have multiple kids and a little one who still needs you at bedtime.
If a night comes when I cannot lay with them or they fall asleep before I make it to them, we just try again the next night. There have been times when we’ve had to try for multiple nights in a row, but we always get our night in for the week! It’s a nice time; it’s late, they’re tired, you can just lay together or chat a bit; it’s the closeness that makes it comforting and warm. My kids never forget and always remind me when it’s their night, so I know it’s become a very special tradition for them.
Walks with my youngest
2. Exercise (Family After-Dinner Walk)
I’m a huge fan of this one because you can reconnect and catch up while doing something healthy together. This one is broken into two parts.
Part 1:
Family Walks After Dinner: Maybe these are less doable in the winter, but I’m at the beginning of summer, and it’s working great. I will keep you posted! This could solely be a summer routine since school is out and there isn’t homework to rush to or earlier bedtimes. After dinner and preferably after kitchen clean-up (you don’t want to come back to a dirty kitchen to clean after a long walk), everyone in the family goes out for a walk. We walk around our reservoir that’s about 0.8 miles.
Walks are good for chatting and playing racing games. Kids love seeing their parents running and laughing with them. An added bonus is everyone is calm and tired by the time you get home!
Part 2:
Share Your Favorite Exercise or Sport with Them: I love yoga. My kids know this and love to try out new poses they see me working on. Most of the time, they are better at it than I am! They have chore charts to complete every day before getting screen time, mostly easy things like reading, making their beds, washing up, and exercise. I try to cater their exercise to their wants. My son wants to be able to do a lot of push-ups, so his exercise is 10 push-ups and 20 jumping jacks. My daughter wants to be able to do a split, so I put forward fold and butterfly stretches for her.
Returning to sharing activities, I showed my daughter how to perform sun salutations and created a step-by-step drawing for her to practice on her own. Sharing this experience was meaningful, and she loves showcasing her progress and newfound ease. It's become a shared interest that brings us closer."
Our current faves, links below
3. Reading
This one is the most common. We know the benefits of reading to our kids, and most parents read to their kids at bedtime. This is what we do in my family. Until my kids became able to read on their own, it became a part of their chore chart, so they would read a chapter or two on their own. I would usually skim the chapters quickly so I knew the story and what to ask about the story. Then I realized I was only reading to my youngest at night before bed. So, now I am reading a second book aloud to everyone, in addition to the little reads with my little one. It’s something we can all talk about and guess what’s going to happen next. It’s a lot of fun! If your kids are old enough, I would recommend the Harry Potter series. Mine are still young, and I think it may be too much for them, so for now we love these:
Clippings My kids keep safe and taped into their books
4. Declutter
This is something we do as parents anyway and is usually the daunting task at the bottom of the list! Personally, I enjoy decluttering and creating new space. I tend to do this as a solitary exercise, and it always leaves me feeling great. However, I have begun involving my kids when I am decluttering their clothes, toys, and junk! Just being more mindful of their belongings and letting them have a say now that they are getting older. They are used to donating toys and getting rid of things, so they don’t have the usual attachments you would expect. My daughter loves drawing and keeping little notes and cute tiny things she finds, but I find they usually end up stuck between something or shoved somewhere and forgotten.
So, we take this time together to look through old things and tell memories or funny stories about what we find. A cool way to keep all of the notes and drawings we aren’t ready to say goodbye to just yet, taping or gluing them into a notebook!
My son and daughter do this, they even tape in leaves and flowers they find outside and write in the dates and events from the day.
5. Music
Saved the best for last! It’s something I think we all do. Play music in the car, dance parties at home, or just set the mood with low volume music playing in the house. There’s also the “Disney kid” music: Elsa songs non-stop, whatever new songs Bluey sings, and you have to look up and find! The list goes on! If you’re in that stage, then great! Playing those songs and singing with your kids is a great way to bond. That’s how it was for a while and still is with my two-year-old. Currently playing the Mulan soundtrack daily! I’m not complaining; she’s one of my favorites of all the princesses!
However, when I cook, I tend to play the music I enjoy. I rarely listen to new music but instead play a lot of my old favorites. One day, my eldest daughter asked why I always play “my music”. *Record scratch! She told me all about how her and her best friend love listening to Taylor Swift in the cafeteria at school. This was a complete shock to me; I didn’t know the school played music for them. That’s pretty cool. However, now my daughter has a love for Taylor Swift, someone I don’t particularly listen to, not for any reason other than I play a lot of old music. My husband and I decided to let her have a kid profile under our Pandora account. I can monitor what she’s listening to and learn her taste in music. We play her favorites in the car (which are quickly becoming my youngest’s favorites now) and let her pick songs to play on our speaker when I’m cooking. My son also started an account, and he’s finding his style of music, which is very house party, pop, and techno.
Just this small thing that is part of our daily lives has opened me up to my kids and their uniqueness and allowed me to bond with them that much more! We love discovering new songs together and adding them to our playlists of dance party music!
So there you have it, five ways to sneak in some quality time and bonding with your kiddos without making it a grand event. I hope some catch your interest and work well for you and your family!
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